Tuesday 15 March 2011

The Splash by Gordon

Jump she cried. It was a big splash.

Kate yelled out: "My feet are killing me." The high-pitched words echoed across the valley in a rapid reverberation. The rock walls were effusing warmth in the hot afternoon sun as I struggled through the thick undergrowth close to the rock walls. It scratched and prickled my arms. The rocks were sharp and broken and every step had to be taken with care so as to find a foothold. My ankles twisted with every step as I picked my way across the huge boulders that had been tossed and turned in every possible direction along the river bed. I yelled back to Kate: "It's not far." "You must be joking", she yelled back.

As I came around the edge of a large rock protuberance I suddenly saw what we had been searching for all day. It was a stunningly beautiful pool with steep rock walls around almost all of it. The rock walls were straight up, hundreds of metres. I waited for Kate and as she also came clamouring around the projecting rock I could feel the rock starting to give way. Kate leapt to grab hold of me in an embrace but the rock wobbled as though balanced on a knife-edge. She grabbed my hand but my balance was lost. "Jump she cried." It was a moment of panic as I had no idea how deep was the water or how far out the rocks went. There was nothing for it but to leap with what leverage remained on the falling rock. It was like pushing yourself on the down pedal of a bicycle when there was no upswing to follow. I had just enough projection out from the rock to miss the rock wall and hit the water with a large belly flop splash. I sank slowly into the water taking in a big gulp. Kate yelled again: "Are you OK". I could just hear the OK as I came to the waters surface. In that moment Kate also leapt away from the tiny rock ledge as she lost her balance--splash again.

I looked around and there seemed no way out as the water ran under the rocks. We both swam to hold onto some small cracks in the rock wall and thought about how might we be rescued.

Gordon MacAulay
15 March 2011

13 comments:

Peta said...

Peta says

whoops just realised I had read this before the prompt ... I loved the scene you set from the outset - it reminded me of somewhere I had been - not sure where. I felt the uncertainty and concern of the jumper the water might be too shallow but no option other than to jump for it ... no time for fear. I wasn't sure about the bike analogy but otherwise I enjoyed the read and the drama.

Sparky Peanut said...

Amazing writing! I am very new to this so hopefully I can find your blog again so I can read more! Thank you!

Unknown said...

There was something about the crumbling rock and the irreversible predicament and the pushing against a falling object that REALLY created the drama. Loved it and am ready for chapter 2.

Kathryn Brees said...

great story! Check out my blog!

Unknown said...

Very Nice Post

i am waiting your next post


Thanks

MacKenzie said...

The bike analogy was a little distracting. But fun read!

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John Struthers said...

Did you die?

Unknown said...

There was something about the crumbling rock and the irreversible predicament and the pushing against a falling object that REALLY created the drama. Loved it and am ready for chapter 2.

Thanks
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